1. If the 60’s are the new 40’s, someone forgot to tell my butt.
2. I made Dick and Jane readers out of yellow scrap paper.
3. The trick here is to tell about your worst date in 25 words or less.
4. I gave away my identity in tiny bits and pieces.
5. There once was a little girl who loved to read, write, and do multiplication.
6. No, I am not a vampire; I am a Boomer and I am aging.
7. Guess who is struggling to keep up?
8. I taught thousands, now all grown men and women.
9. His ruthless abandon with onion, garlic, and everything chicken left me weak.
10. I decided to scuttle my ships and march toward my destiny at all cost.
11. My oldest grandson turns ten, a full dime.
12. Life is a game. Play it well and there will be no regrets.
13. Let’s view the 4th of July not through sunglasses but through the eyes of an immigrant.
14. A well-constructed sentence is a thing of beauty.
15. What really hurts more than anything is ego.
16. I get vicious when people come in late then expect me to move over so they can have the aisle seat.
17. “Write what you know.” Just what exactly is that?
18. Dating Rule # 1: Never date a man with better hair or a better chest than you.
19. My grandmother was a no nonsense lady with a stern exterior, but she loved and cared for us.
20. I decided to run away. I was nine.
21. We spend our lives crossing off days on calendars in anticipation or reluctance of some future date.
22. Funny thing about regret, it doesn’t ensure remorse.
23. Real sentences are immensely better grammar and syntax learning opportunities than a worksheet.
24. “Come to my house every day, Comadre, to work out, and when I look better, we will go to the gym.”
25. I may be gray and my collagen may be collapsing, but I still know how to rock and roll.
26. I had my arthritic butt whupped by octogenarians who out-downward-dogged me.
27. It is not often one attempts such an intrusion.
28. Mom and Dad became parents for the sixth time. Mom was 77; Dad was 83.
29. I met my husband on the Internet, eHarmony to be exact.
30. My free membership was running out and I was still dateless.
31. How can you not fall for someone who calls you Goddess every, single day?
32. There’s a reason the word EXERCISE consists of eight letters. It is a double four-letter cuss word.
33. He looked at me as if I were speaking in tongues.
34. I read a book on body language, ingesting enough info to make me a dangerous armchair expert.
35. 2012-ers are so frantic preparing for the end of time, they forget that life is measured by how we live it, what we accomplish, and how we made a difference.
36. I’ve been snookered by Snickers, seduced by salty chips, two-timed by tacos, and hoodwinked by hotcakes.
37. I forget my dad is gone and I reach for the phone.
38. Let’s mambo!
39. Two hundred fifty years and ten generations of oral tradition will one day make an interesting read.
40. My head looked more like a clump of old, dry oregano than the salt and pepper it is now.
41. I have no idea why my brain chose that memory, a random photo one finds in an old shoe box.
42. Once upon a time, not so very long ago, there lived a little boy and his grandmother. They were best friends.
43. There are things that cannot be undone, words that cannot be retracted, actions that cannot be rescinded.
44. We each respond viscerally to the assigned book we read.
45. Why do I live here? He is 5’8”, smiles a lot, and kisses me every time he walks into the house.
46. One should never retire “from;” one should retire “to” something.
47. “Show not tell” – what exactly does that mean?
48. I could do this. I could write a novel.
49. Voice is a flavor, a fingerprint, a signature.
50. I am all ears, all thumbs, and all the better for it.
51. Goodbye donuts. Hello Nikes.
52. Courage is not pompous or selfish.
53. The women in my family were worried that by the time I finished with college I would be past my Sell By date.
This blog marks its first anniversary today. Thank you all who read it.