The Benefits of Retirement

1.    You get to be the boss of you.

2.     Ditch the alarm clock.  On those rare occasions you need one, use the one on your iPhone.

3.    No more dreading Mondays or looking forward to hump days.  Your weekends and holidays will be truly your own and not time you have to spend on work related deadlines.

4.    No more government briefs, work guides, and data charts.  You get to learn and develop, read and write what YOU want.

5.    Every day is casual Friday or wear-your-jeans-to-work day. Throw in there an occasional day where you spend it all in your pajamas or rattiest sweats out of love and respect for all your friends who can’t.

6.    While you are at it, redo your closet and get rid of all constricting and confining clothes and shoes.  You don’t have to be athletic to shop in the athletic department; buy yoga pants, sensible sneakers, and sports bras in protest against all the years you spent stuffed into suits and stilettos. 

7.    You will not only save $$$ on your simplified wardrobe, but also on car maintenance, cosmetics and toiletries, and on sleep aides and energy drinks.

8.    Breakfast becomes a fantasy come true. No more instant oatmeal, frozen toaster things, or donuts. You can actually sit down to breakfast, enjoy a second cup of coffee or tea, and read the morning news in the morning.

9.    You will also be able to streamline your email and phone contact lists. Delete all those folks you never really liked or respected but had to pretend in order to keep your job. Remember quality over quantity is a reality and no longer a myth. Create space for those folks you do like and for new friends; cleanse your soul of all that negativity and restore balance and peace in your life.

10. Retirement will also improve your overall health. Your dentist will notice that your dry mouth syndrome has improved; your internist will likewise notice a drop in your high blood pressure and your LDL levels.  All because you no longer have to pretend smile or put up with people you do not like or respect. Life is good on this side.