(To be sung to the melody of the
12 Days of Christmas. Good luck.)
1.
The first
must-do for Thanksgiving: buy a pair of sweatpants in one size larger.
2.
The second must-do on Thanksgiving: run both
parades on the TV even though no one will watch them.
3.
The third must-do on Thanksgiving: watch all three
NFL football games (or take a nap while they are on).
4.
The fourth must-do for Thanksgiving: create four
meals with the leftover turkey.
5.
The fifth must-do: eat five servings of your
favorite dish: stuffing, potatoes, pie, whatever.
6.
The sixth must-do: eat six pork tamales to offset
all that turkey.
7.
The seventh must-do on Thanksgiving: watch seven
holiday specials (parades and football games count also).
8.
The eighth must-do: take 8 shots or 8 squirts of
any or all of the following: booze (tequila), beer, wine, canned whip cream.
9.
The ninth must-do of Thanksgiving: if on the ninth day, you still
have leftovers in the fridge, throw them away, plastic container and all. Eww.
10. The tenth
must-do: give $10.00 to your local food bank for each person living under your
roof.
11. The
eleventh must-do: say Happy Holidays to eleven family members or friends before
the end of the day, especially those who live alone or live far away.
12. The
twelfth must-do on Thanksgiving: learn how to say Thank you in twelve different
languages and use them all today. Here’s a starter:
Shukran
(Shoe-Krahn) - Arabic
Xie
xie (Syeh-syeh) - Mandarin
Merci
– French
Danke
– German
Efharisto
(ef-har-rih-stowe) – Greek
Mahalo
– Hawaiian
Toda
(Toh-dah) – Hebrew
Grazie
– Italian
Arigato
– Japanese
Obrigado
– Portuguese
Gracias
– Spanish
Asante
(ah-sahn-the) - Swahili
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