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“Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”


The worst pain I have ever endured was my divorce.  I had been lied to.  I had been humiliated.  I had been treated like an imbecile.   
I was angry. Very angry.
When I sought help, I was told to forgive and forget, but no one told me HOW someone does that.
This is what I figured out:
1.    I sought help from counselors, church, and community.  I listened to advice.  I took meds for depression.  I prayed.  I relied on my family and friends.
2.    I assessed my surroundings.  I counted my blessings: my job, my home, my family, my abilities, my possibilities.
3.    I came to the realization that the opposite of love is not hate.  The opposite of love is nothing, feeling nothing for that person. It gave me a goal and I worked toward letting him go so that he became nothing more to me than an annoyance with whom I shared a past.
4.    I took responsibility for my half of the failed marriage.  I should have never allowed another person to treat me less than how I deserved to be treated.

5.    I realized that one can forgive but not forget.  We learn from past mistakes. 

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