“. . . let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.” 1 John 3:18 (NIV) Every Christmas, I used to include myself in the purchase of gifts. I’d often take advantage of the sales and bought myself a new car or the latest electronics. One Christmas, however, what I needed the most could not be bought. I felt an emptiness that affected everything around me. Nothing I could buy would assuage the pain. I needed to forgive the person who hurt me, and I needed to forgive myself for my part in that failed relationship. It wasn’t easy to let go of years of anger, so I started by verbally forgiving the person, and then, I forgave myself. My words became actions, and my actions transformed me. Last Christmas, I chose another such gift. I gave myself permission to walk away from vitriolic “friendships.” We may not have parted how I would have liked, but I am much happier without the constant bickering. We can choose to smile or frown, love or hate,